Do You Know What God Thinks?

I like knowledge and information. When I said yes to marriage, I read books on how to be a good wife. When I had kids I read about how to be a good parent. When they became teenagers, I read even more books about how to prepare them to be a responsible adult. When I followed the call to ministry, I read and read and read and am still reading in order to learn all I can to help as many as I can. There is so very much I want to know and understand. And I suspect many of you feel the same. 

Most of us don't want to be mediocre parents or spouses or employees or friends. We want to know the best way to handle the most difficult situations and be a successful as possible in all arenas of life. 

Looking at marriage statistics, our chances of success are slim. When it comes to raising children, there are experts everywhere to remind us that we are going to mess our kids up, but we should try to keep that at a minimum. Not very encouraging, so it's easy to feel like all is gloom and doom with regard to living victoriously, however, I would like to offer you some encouragement along with a plan of action. It is the easiest and yet it is likely the most difficult thing you will ever attempt. All you have to do is slow down and listen. Very simple. Yet, very difficult. It is counter-intuitive to slow our pace because the people  all around us are furiously running past us, doing more, trying harder, being awesome (or so it would seem) at  juggling life and keeping all the balls in the air. It is our natural response in this culture to rush to stay in step with those who look so successful. And rush you must if it is your goal to live successfully in this culture. BUT if it is your goal to live in the culture that Jesus calls us to that is not congruent with this world, then you have to slow down and listen.

If you have decided to follow the way of Jesus and allow Him to reign supreme as your King, then His Spirit lives within you, to guide you and lead you to the Father at any moment of any day. He will direct your steps, help you make the right decision, shape you into the person you were made to be. But, He seldom, if ever, shouts over the noise we expose ourselves to. Rather, He waits for us to draw apart to a quiet place and silently listen for Him to lead us in the right way. Jesus often demonstrated this for His disciples because He knew the value of quiet communion with His Father.

I read somewhere that if you want your kids to know Jesus, spend less time talking to them about Him and spend more time talking to Him about them. I would alter that some and invite you to spend more time LISTENING to Him so that He can direct your parenting decisions. When it comes to your marriage, do the same. He will teach you how to give and receive love, if you will only listen. You will recognize His voice if you have taken the time to learn who He is by being a student of His Word. If you just can't find the time to be still and listen - even just 10 minutes a day, then you are likely to wander in the wilderness of life, doing your best to do your best. And that might seem like it's good enough. It may even be better than a lot of people. But, if you choose His way and heed His advice and set aside time to allow the Spirit of God to share the message of God with you, it will be a game changer. Your life will be a reflection of the One who made you and you will fulfill the plan that He made for you, which I far prefer over wandering and wondering. 

Troubled Hearts

Sometimes there is, deep inside of me, a profound sense that I am utterly alone. I have lost all those who shaped my childhood and made me who I am and without them I fear that nobody can truly know me. Some days, I'm not even sure I know who I am. Those feelings don't represent reality, but they are very real. I have lived with my dear husband far longer than I did my parents and nobody knows me like he does. I have precious friends who I can be completely transparent with and they know me very well. But some days, I just feel alone and lost without my parents and the aunt and uncle who had the most profound impact on me. 

I am so grateful for the heritage that is mine and the fact that I have had such special people who impacted me so profoundly that I still long to sit down and chat with them. I am grateful for those friends who know what I need even when I don't. I would be lost without Dana, a companion who walks patiently and lovingly beside me throughout the journey of my life, and for children and grandchildren who bring me great joy. But, as amazing as my life and my people are, sometimes there is still darkness and pain.

I know that I am not alone and that if you are breathing, you have experienced pain and loss and  possibly utter loneliness. For some of us, that is not a place to be feared because it points us directly to the Comforter. The Advocate. The Counselor. That's where I find myself. In the old rocking chair my Dad bought me the year that he died, looking within myself, finding the place that the Spirit of God inhabits and just quietly listening for His direction; His comfort; His peace.

If you find yourself in a place where the waters seem troubled and you struggle to know where to turn, try sitting still and listening to the Spirit within you. He will give you what you need and remind you that you are not alone and forgotten. If you are a follower of Jesus, you need not be afraid for you are never alone. His Spirit lives within you and will give you all you need.

He's Inside

Life is full of battles. Kids. Partners. Coworkers. Illness. Bills. Relationships. Parents. The list is long and makes us all exhausted at any given time. Physically, Mentally, Emotionally. Spiritually. But, we have what we need for the counter attack when we are followers of Jesus. We don't have to go to a special place or attend a certain number of church services or memorize a designated number of Bible verses. We don't have to travel to Tibet or to the Vatican. We don't have to do anything, but sit quietly and acknowledge the Presence of the Spirit of God who is living within us and wait to "hear" from Him as He gives direction for brokering the peace treaty that we need in the battle waged against our very souls.

You probably already know that, as did I, however, recently I was somehow reminded by an unheard voice, "I'm right here inside of you. Let me speak into your life." I think I forgot that I don't have to go find God, because God has come to me! He is right there inside waiting for me to slow down from all that I think I should be doing and quietly sit, awaiting the message He has for me. 

Sometimes in the quiet I discover that I am trying to do God's job instead of mine. Sometimes I discover that I need to love better. Sometimes I find that running from conflict will never solve the problem. Sometimes I know that I just need to sit still and listen to the silence in order to retrain my brain to accept silence as a healthy practice.

No matter where you find yourself today, remember that if you are a follower of God and desire to strengthen your relationship with others, it begins by strengthening your relationship with Him and that requires time in silence and solitude. If there is another way, in half a century of searching, I have not found it. There is no substitute for quietly listening. He seldom shouts over the noise we surround ourselves with or interrupts the activities we involve ourselves in. He waits patiently for us to sit still and accept the gift of His presence, as a cup of cool water when we are so very thirsty.

If you are struggling in a battle with another person or simply struggling with a battle within yourself, remember that the Spirit of God is inside you. He can see all the other things that are in there, possibly leaving Him little room to work... or even be noticed. You can refresh your mind and your spirit by taking the time to sit in silence with Him, finding out what needs to be eliminated, discovering what needs to be added, learning the way to do the next right thing. I invite you to sit quietly and be refreshed with His living water as you enjoy His company and learn from Him.

Think*Practice*Follow

I have been familiar with the Philippians 4 passage that implores us to think about the positive and beneficial things; things that are true, praise worthy and admirable, but somehow I missed something until I was listening to the pastor read it on Sunday. I had always skipped over a crucial part of what Paul was saying. I knew that if we were to focus our thoughts on the things of God that we would find peace. Period. But, that's not the whole message. I was struck by a very important part of the instructions that is so critical to bring into our home.

After zeroing in on the truthful thoughts we are to allow into our mind to focus upon, Paul goes on to say, "Put into practice all you learned from me." How is it, that even though I have quoted this section of scripture for years, I had overlooked an important ingredient to finding peace. It isn't just what we think, it's what we practice. And not just what we practice, but deliberately practicing the things we have been taught by a good, solid mentor. It is a wonderful thing to have a mentor who knows the Word of God; who has walked with Jesus for years; who is mature in their faith and is growing closer to Him year after year. I hope you have that person in your life and I hope that you take advantage of all the wisdom they have to share.

But... what about your kids? Who is their mentor in the faith? Who can they look to for their spiritual formation? Is that something you are willing to pass off to the teachers at church? Their youth leader? Or is that something you should be responsible for? I would suggest to you, a godly parent that is pleasing to Jesus must be willing to be learning and teaching; growing and leading; spiritually mentoring their kids as a lifestyle.

It hit me like a ton of bricks that I could not have said to my kids, like Paul did to his spiritual kids, "Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me -- everything you heard from me and saw me doing..." and feel good about how they might behave! Maybe quite the opposite! Once again, I found myself wishing for a do-over. I wanted to go back in time and use the spiritual maturity I have gained since my kids left home and set a better example for them. It really made me look at myself and desire to be a better student, a more faithful servant, a gentler more merciful human for the sake of those who will come behind me.

Please don't wait until your kids are gone to draw closer to Jesus. Don't wait until your schedule is less crazy to find time to meditate on the truth that will bring freedom to your mind. Don't wait until you understand everything in the Bible to share it with your kids. Do what you can NOW and make some mistakes (like I did)... but DO move toward being a mentor for your kids TODAY. Be ready to tell them you are sorry when you mess up. Be humble and allow them to see that you are a student, learning and growing and making mistakes and even failing a few tests along the way. But, make being a godly mentor to your kids a critical priority in your life. You can't depend on anyone else to teach them the way you can, because they see you up close and personal and witness how you handle the tough places in life day after day. You have the best stage from which to demonstrate the love of God and His call to obedience to His Word.

Consider the fact that this formula for experiencing the peaceful presence of God involves what you think, what you practice and who you follow. In a time and place where anxiety is commonplace and peace is scarce, perhaps it's time for us to take seriously the advice of Paul and THINK POSITIVELY, PRACTICE DILIGENTLY, and FOLLOW FAITHFULLY so that our kids and grandkids have a good mentor to lead them.