What Do You Think?

Parents, what does it take to get you to change your mind? Begging? Public tantrums? Tears? What turns your “NO!” to an “Okay, just stop making a scene!” We have all seen and heard these outbursts that get a child what they want because parents are trying to alter an undesired behavior.  It seems to me that this is completely upside down. It is our responsibility as parents to be working to bring about change in the behavior of our children. When it is the children who weaken our resolve, it is a lose/lose proposition. Kids get to raise themselves by calling the shots, shaping their own values, and making decisions based on desire rather than wisdom.

We all know where this type of leadership is taking the home and it is frightening, at best. What I would invite you to see is a similar tragedy and it is happening to adults who call themselves children of God. We have a Heavenly Father, directing us to the plan that He crafted long before he allowed our birth to take place (Ephesians 2:10). He has given us direct orders, but often we have our own agenda and we beg, defy, turn our heads, rationalize and slam the door in His face so that we can get things to go our way. Not seeing it? Let me give you a few examples…

God says… Honor one another above yourselves. We fight to be right even if it brings pain to those we have promised to love for a lifetime. The divorce rate is as high among Christians as it is in those who don’t profess to follow Christ.

God says… Put NOTHING before me. We have career goals and friends and social media all of which take more of our thoughts, time and energy than we devote to knowing and following God. Do God followers look any different than those who follow their own ambitions?

God says… Teach your children all that I have done so they will follow me. Many hours each week are devoted to the athletic or academic development of our children. Do followers of Jesus look the same as those who don’t know Him when it comes to these priorities or are they placing a higher priority of time invested in teaching their kids from God’s Word? Are they even reading it themselves?

If we are going to be Ambassadors for Christ and turn a dying world to Him, it is time to stop our defiant behavior, turning from His will, and start truly being obedient followers. The Apostle Paul tells us in Romans 12 that we, as dedicated followers of Christ need to stop behaving as the world behaves. We need to change our minds and stop trying to change His mind, like a stubborn and defiant child.

Paul goes on to say that He will transform us so that we don’t make the same decisions and mistakes that the world makes. He will make us different from the world. How? He will change the way we think. When we undergo a change in our thinking, allowing His sculpting of our thoughts, we will begin to see a marked change in our actions. We will no longer look like the world, but will begin to love more deeply, follow more closely and lead more wisely.

What does it take for you to change your mind? A realization that the Father knows best; that He has a plan for your life; that wearing the disguise of the lost will lead you to the path of destruction; that His laws are based in love. Let God transform you by changing the way you think. Aligning your thoughts with Divine thoughts will make you the parent your children need. Defying the God who made you and loves you never ends well. Take off the disguise of the world and let the world know that you are making a change in the way your family lives. You have chosen to find your way by following the One, not the world.

And so, dear brothers and sisters, I plead with you to give your bodies to God

 because of all he has done for you.

Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable.

This is truly the way to worship him.

 ² Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world,

but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think.

 Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

Romans 12:1-2

Praying On His Armor

When my kids were young I developed the practice of praying on the armor of God as I drove them to school. I made sure that they were dressed appropriately before we went out the door. Long sleeves in cool weather. Short sleeves in warm weather. Boots in snow. Shoes that didn’t make their toes curl. You know. I covered the basics for their body to be dressed appropriately, so why not their soul?

It was a good practice not only for them but for me. It made me think about what it meant to be strong in the mighty power of the Lord and put on the armor of Christ as described in Ephesians 6…

¹⁰ Finally, let the Lord make you strong. Depend on his mighty power.¹¹ Put on all of God’s armor. Then you can remain strong against the devil’s evil plans. ¹² Our fight is not against human beings. It is against the rulers, the authorities and the powers of this dark world. It is against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly world. 

We are not raising our kids in easy times. I am fairly certain that all generations would say the same. The devil truly does have evil plans for our kids and when we back down, we make his job easy. I was not willing to hand the souls of my kids over to the enemy, so I did what the next verses describe…

¹³ So put on all of God’s armor. Evil days will come. But you will be able to stand up to anything. And after you have done everything you can, you will still be standing.¹⁴ So remain strong in the faith.

That’s what I wanted for my kids… but how?

Put the belt of truth around your waist.  

I prayed… Lord, wrap your truth around my kids so that all the lies they hear about who you are, who they are, what it right and what is wrong will not sway them because they are surrounded in YOUR TRUTH. And help me, Lord, to stay true to what I profess and live honestly and consistently before them.

Put the armor of godliness on your chest

I prayed… Lord, as a breastplate guards the heart, may their hearts be protected because they are reflecting Your goodness. Place godly people along their path today, to show them the right steps and help me to be one of those people.

 ¹⁵ Wear on your feet what will prepare you to tell the good news of peace.

I prayed… Lord, it is so much a part of our nature to rush to spread gossip or complaints or negative thoughts. Open their little eyes to the tragedy those words bring and give them words of comfort and affirmation to share with those who need to experience Your peace.

 ¹⁶ Also, pick up the shield of faith. With it you can put out all the flaming arrows of the evil one.

I prayed…Father, the world is full of challenges to our faith. Surround my children with armor bearers who will help them hold up the shield that will protect them from the attack of Satan that could cause them to take their eyes off of You and the plan you have laid out for them.

 ¹⁷ Put on the helmet of salvation.

I prayed… Father, we cannot be who You made us to be if we forget who You are and the gift of salvation You provide. Keep their thoughts according to your will and remind them constantly of your goodness and grace.

And take the sword of the Holy Spirit. The sword is God’s word.

I prayed… God, help me be faithful to the reading of Your Word so that I can know You better. You have provided a testimony to who you are in your Word. Help me to know you better so that I can be a better reflection of you for the sake of my children.

¹⁸ At all times, pray by the power of the Spirit. Pray all kinds of prayers. Be watchful, so that you can pray. Always keep on praying for all the Lord’s people.

And this was my practice almost daily for the years I drove them to school. I wanted them to know that I had prayed the armor of God on them and that there was nothing they could not do with that armor on.

Prayer is essential to godly parenting. Listen to Michelle's story about why she decided to bathe her children in  prayer:

http://momsinprayer.org/prayerforchildren?gclid=Cj0KEQiArou2BRDcoN_c6NDI3oMBEiQANeix5gg6TQ8P70EOzN2iRuUd2gKwapGffTQxvRYEXb2KRDAaAhnE8P8HAQ

Roots

 This is a Strangler Fig tree in the Rain Forest of eastern Australia. Beneath the root network you see a host tree that will die because the roots of the Fig will eventually "strangle" it. The fig seeds are actually deposited in the canopy of the rain forest by birds. They could never grow if planted in the soil because they would receive no sunlight there. As the sun shines on them, they reach heavenward and begin to send their roots over a hundred feet down to the forest floor, drawing nutrients from their host as they travel, so their roots can become strong and healthy. This is a process that takes hundreds of years, but happens only because nature places within that fig seed an unquenchable desire to grow and survive. It instinctively knows that, without roots, it will perish. Here is the message God gave to the Prophet Jeremiah in Jeremiah 17, regarding our roots...

“But I will bless anyone who trusts in me.

    I will do good things for the person who depends on me.

8 

They will be like a tree planted near water.

    It sends out its roots beside a stream.

It is not afraid when heat comes.

    Its leaves are always green.

It does not worry when there is no rain.

    It always bears fruit.”

Think about the roots of your children. Without spiritual roots their journey will not end with an eternal reward. Sometimes they grow, in spite of our failure to help them find roots and, like the Strangler Fig, they will find their way to the soil that will nourish them, providing a way for them to grow in their faith even if they are not planted by the Water of which Jeremiah speaks. But, as parents, the spiritual well-being of our children is our responsibility. Leaving that to chance, we are doing no better than planting bird excrement at the top of a rain forest and hoping for the best.

True concern for the spiritual well-being of our children means we are constantly cultivating the soil around them to help their roots grow. Planting them by the Water means we are essentially giving them constant access to the Source of goodness and godliness. We are instructing them, reading to them, growing in faith ourselves so that we are naturally seeing all the teachable moments that occur daily. We are being an example to them as we walk with Jesus in our daily life.

My prayer is that you are tending the soil of your child's soul, exposing them constantly to the Son; drenching them in the Spirit of God living in you; pruning them so that they will grow and bear fruit in their lives.

Remember the Sabbath???

The wisest man that ever lived warns us not to lean on what seems right to us but to look to the only One who truly knows the way we should go (Proverbs 3:5-7).  Solomon learned the hard way that doing what seems perfectly logical in our human way of thinking can be devastating. His home and kingdom were in a state of ruin because he made decisions based on what was wise, according to his culture. In hindsight, he begs those who will listen to find God’s path.

In children’s church this past week we talked about how Saul, persecutor of Christians, thought what he was doing was something God wanted him to do. He used the information he had and the wisdom he had gained studying under the best teachers of his time. The only thing that stopped him was to be blinded by the Truth. In essence, Saul had to have his way of thinking erased and his focus changed in order to find the real reason God put him on this earth.

That is the same kind of transformation that we need to take our focus from what the world  dictates to what God requires. If we would allow God to wipe our hard-drive clean and reprogram our thoughts, we could find the reason we are here and stop wasting so much time doing the things that seem wise to us. As I talked about how easy it is to get wrapped up in what the world says is right a 3^rd grade boy raised his hand and said, “It’s like last summer when we were in church learning about God and all those kids were outside playing baseball. They think that is what is important, but then they never get to know what we learn here and don’t get to worship God and stuff.”

Out of the mouths of babes!  We don’t have to look very far to see areas where we have chosen the wisdom of the world over the wisdom of the Word. If you truly believe it is important for your kids to find God and follow him, what are you doing about it?  You can and should be teaching them the truth of scripture at home and living your own life accordingly, but that isn’t all the Bible says about following God. Hebrews 10:25 teaches us that we are not to neglect our time of worship together. Throughout the New Testament we learn that we are to meet together to sing praise, to pray, to share and to learn together. Is that the priority in your home?

I understand that, in our society, we are compelled to have our kids in sports and in our society, Sunday is no longer a day of worship. The wisdom of the world says that sport is where we learn good habits, self-discipline, motivation and a healthy life-style. Furthermore, if we don’t enroll them at a very young age, they will not be competitive enough to play in high school. If they don’t play in high school they will not be able to get that scholarship that will cut down on college debt. That is just good stewardship, right? And besides, if God gave our kid talent in a particular sport, we have to give them every opportunity to develop it… and of course, give Him all the glory.

This makes perfect sense in our culture. But when our children are raising our grandchildren and they have no use for the church or what it represents, perhaps then we will see the dangerous, pseudo wisdom that has taken our focus off of God. It’s not too late to take a stand for what is wise according to scripture. Let God blind you to the wrong path and open your eyes to wisdom and truth according to His Word. Take a lesson from the Apostle Paul… and Cade… and realize, before it’s too late, that your kids need to “worship God and stuff.”