New Year - New You

Have you been looking back at 2015 and wondering about how 2016 will be different? Better?  It’s that time of year that we all tend to scrutinize and analyze, plot and plan. Here are a few suggestions that I have stolen from some really wise people who place great value on raising their kids to honor God. Here is what they have suggested…

Always look at the heart of your child, not just the behavior. Behavior comes from an internal issue. Listen to them and find out why they are behaving as they are and correct the behavior from the heart level.

Speak to others with respect and don’t yell. When we raise our voice we are demonstrating that we are not in control. That is NOT what we want them to believe is acceptable behavior.

Correct undesired behavior with examples of what could or should have been said or done. As they get older, ask them. “How could you have handled that better?”

Never speak unkindly or disrespectfully about others in the presence of your children. It will teach them that it is okay to be judgmental and critical of others.

Make sure that your day includes more face time than it does screen time. Social media can wait until the kids are sleeping.

If you are married, treat your spouse the way you want your child’s spouse to someday treat them. You are setting their “normal” so if you are rude to your spouse, they will likely date people who are rude to them and think nothing of it.

Plan ahead for healthy meals so that you aren’t pumping your kids full of processed food that will have a huge impact on behavior and health. Portion out your fruit and veggies in snack size bags so you can easily grab and go! Check out the website plantoeat.com for a tool that can make your life easier and healthier.

Develop routines for cleaning and organizing to minimize frustration that comes when things start to pile up. By pre-school age have your kids involved in small duties and expand them as they grow. Keep it simple: Monday, collect and empty waste baskets. Tuesday, fold towels. Etc.

Read to your children and instill the love of books in them. It will make school easier if they love to read.

Make worship a priority in your home. If something is keeping you from weekly church attendance, make sure that it isn’t keeping you from worshiping God together.

Read a book or two this year that will make you a better person. Some of my favorite authors are Francis Chan, Kyle Idleman, Max Lucado and Beth Moore… if you needed a suggestion.

Laugh out loud. Don’t take yourself too seriously.

Listen to Christian radio and keep a children’s cd of Sunday School Songs in your vehicle so the kids are learning truths from the Bible in the songs they sing.

Love your parents. Your kids will likely treat you as well as you treat your parents some day. Let them see that you value them and honor them, even if you don’t always enjoy or agree with them.

Remind your children to honor others above themselves, treat others as they wish to be treated, show respect to all people and be kind. This is not superfluous, but the behavior that honors God and creates peace in our homes. Expect it and settle for nothing less.

Apply Romans 12:2 to every waking moment and let God transform you by changing the way your think. The way you think determines how you feel and the way you feel will dictate your words and actions. Give your thoughts to God and let him have control of reshaping them. It will improve all your relationships.

At Just The RIGHT Time???

We have all heard it said, “timing is everything.” We like to align our circumstances, get our duckies are in a row and plan out the happily ever after ending. Wait until he is in a good mood before you tell him you wrecked his car. Wait until she is in a better mood before you tell her that dress is NOT flattering. Wait until the price drops to this number before you make that purchase. Wait until you have this much in the bank before you start a family. Then, at just the right time… the perfect time… things work out just as you planned.

In the story of Jesus (God, in human form coming to earth to live among us filthy, undeserving people) we hear the term, “at just the right time.” The timing must have been perfect because it was God that orchestrated the entire event. He got to choose the “who”, the “when” and the “where” throughout all of history for Jesus to make his appearance. So let’s take a look at this perfect timing of the God of the universe.

THE WHO:  First, he needed a host for the infant to make his appearance. Mary! Perfect! … wait… Mary was a single Jewish girl. This can’t be the right person to choose for the job! Jewish females were pretty much worthless in society, except for their ability to bear children. But… she was unmarried… no husband… no notoriety, no prestige. She can’t possibly be the mother of the King of the Jews! She was engaged to Joseph, however, so if she could convince him to stick around after she told him this ridiculous story about the baby within her being the child of the Holy Spirit, at least they could be a family. But what are the chances that this fine Jewish carpenter is going to believe that? He didn’t buy it and he was walking away from this scandal… at least until the Angel of the Lord appeared and changed his mind!

So this carpenter is going to be the dad to a baby that isn’t his. People will talk. People will point fingers at them. If only the timing had been different and they were already married they would have escaped all the gossip. “Why me?” Joseph must have wondered. And rightly so. Looking at his family tree you don’t find royalty for centuries past. He isn’t a priest, doesn’t live in Jerusalem, and he is a commoner who works with his hands and certainly doesn’t have the means to properly raise a King. What in the world is God thinking right now. This makes no sense!

It doesn’t get better… God literally throws this young woman into the home of this carpenter so that they can become a family. If you are married you already know that becoming “one” with that special person isn’t really all romance and bliss. There are adjustments to be made and lessons to learn. Taking into account the fact that she is a teenager, lacking maturity; is now obviously pregnant before the marriage causing stares and slanderous gossip; within her there is a battle ensuing of brand new, inexplicable and uncontrollable hormonal shifts; and the intimacy they may both be craving must be postponed until after the birth of this mystery she is carrying.

THE WHEN: The crisis continues when the decree is announced that, in her last trimester when she is feeling as big as a house and doesn’t know whether to be excited or ashamed or scared to death, she has to travel to the town of their origin to be a part of the first census. Great timing! Never before has there been a census and Caesar chooses NOW? I can hear her now, “Are you kidding me? We have to take a road trip?” We aren’t talking about just across town to visit your parents. We are talking 80 miles! How long would it take you to walk 80 miles when you are ready to be done with the heartburn, practice contractions (or are they practice contractions? Remember, this is her first child and all that she is feeling is subject to question), and… how do I say this politely???  Let’s just say there were probably a whole lot of stops along the way and no proper facilities!

THE WHERE:  Finally, the timing seems to be improving, for just as the contractions seem to be bearing down on her, the lights of Bethlehem appear. At least they will be able to find a suitable place to have this baby and he won’t be delivered on the open road!  They reach the town and, much to their dismay, every extra bed in town is already filled with others who have come to be counted in the census. If only they had been able to travel faster, they may have had a place to stay. If only there were no baby… less stops along the way… better timing could have made all the  difference!

I wonder how many times Joseph was offered a stable and how many times Mary said, “I am NOT having this baby in a barn! Keep looking!” The fear and anxiety of delivering a little baby is incomparable to any other experience on earth. “I want this baby out of me! No, wait! It hurts too bad! Make it stop! Please God, make him come! No, I am not ready to do this!” Back and forth the mind swings until the moment comes when there is no stopping the inevitable and perhaps Mary’s shrieks could be heard throughout the village. “I don’t care if it’s the worst barn in this town! I have to lie down… NOW!

We have heard the Christmas story many times and found it to be quaint and comforting, but when you really look at the story of Jesus coming on that first Christmas night, there is not a single thing for those involved that appears to be good timing in our human way of thinking.

Maybe, as you look at the things for which you are waiting in your own life, it seems that God’s timing is not lining up with yours.

“…but at just the right time, GOD…”  His timing is the RIGHT timing. We seldom see it. Life often looks like it is never going to align with what we want, the way we planned, the way it “should” be. The story of our Messiah; our Savior; our Redeemer coming to earth to reconcile us to our Creator proves that, what looks like disaster from the human perspective, is truly “just the right time” in God’s plan.

This Christmas, may your heart be renewed and your hope be restored as you take a glimpse into the greatest event of all time, orchestrated by the Master Designer,  and see that, in spite of our human understanding, God really does work things out “at just the right time.”

I am praying that, whoever you are, wherever you are, you will find a Merry Hope-filled Christmas!

Hope Misplaced

12082015 Bringing it home

Sunday the Pastor wrapped up his sermon on “The Thrill of Hope” with the question, “What is it that you stress about? What do you fear? Perhaps that is where your hope is, rather than in the miracle of Jesus.”  Emmanuel is God with us; the infant King who came from heaven to earth to be our Redeemer, our Restorer, our Hope. Yet it seems so easy to fall into the trap of putting all our faith in our own ability to provide for ourselves; to control our environment; to align our life just the way we planned.

Another wonderful conversation with my dad this week led me down the same path that the Pastor sent us on Sunday. He talked about the hope we have in Jesus, “When we truly deserved another flood, God gave us a baby. Over and over again we fail to live up to who He created us to be. We don’t walk in step with Him; we seek our will over His; we don’t listen; don’t obey. Yet, in spite of our wickedness, He didn’t destroy the world, but gave us the gift of a baby King that was born in a barn to unlikely parents of royalty. A baby that would forever bring hope to the world.

Babies are God’s way of saying there is HOPE. There is reason to believe that we can get this right. They bring us new beginnings. Babies bring joy. We have had a large crop of babies born in our church family in the past few months and more are coming in 2016. What a blessing it is to hold them and love them and teach them they are loved by the One who created them. What an honor it is to introduce them to Emmanuel, God with us. What a privilege to teach them that there is HOPE.

I encourage you to take a look at where you are placing your hope. Your job? Your paycheck? Your skills? Your health? Your talent?  Your family? Here is the thing you need to know… your kids can see it and are learning where to place their hope by watching you. Take a step in the right direction and shift your Hope to the One who cannot fail and have a Merry, Hope-filled, Christmas!

Hang on to Hope

One of my favorite Christmas stories is “The Little Spider,” by Sigmund Brouwer. It tells the story of the vast array of animals in the stable after Jesus birth when the Angel warned Joseph in a dream to leave before the soldiers, under orders from King Herod, came to kill the baby.  Each of the animals is full of hope that they can ensure their safety by traveling with Mary, Joseph and the baby Jesus.  Off they go in the dark of night as traveling companions to the family, convinced that they will never leave their side…certain they will be the hero that will rescue the Christ Child.

As the story continues, the mouse loses hope and becomes discouraged because he is certainly too small to be of assistance. The cat soon drops out of the picture as he is enticed by all that he sees outside of the stable he called home. Dog saw the size of Herod’s army marching toward them and lost hope because he was so outnumbered that victory against all those soldiers seemed unlikely, if not impossible.

Mary and Joseph found a cave to hide in so they could rest for a while. The little spider was the only traveling companion left with them. When she saw them shivering against the cold night air seeping into the cave that was already damp and chilled all she could offer was to begin to spin a web over the opening to the cave so that the family would be protected from the cool wind that howled.

As morning broke and Joseph awoke he could hear the sound of soldiers approaching the entrance of the cave. Quietly they huddled in the darkness, praying for God’s protection. The soldiers were just about to enter the cave when one of the men noticed the web that Spider had spent the entire night creating. “There is no one inside. Anyone entering would have torn that spider’s web,” he observed. And the soldiers passed on, leaving Joseph, Mary and Jesus in peace.

The least likely of all the travelers was the one to do the most good because she didn’t lose hope. This Christmas, I pray that you will keep doing good… even if you don’t understand why or what good it is accomplishing. Do what you can with great hope that God will bless your efforts. Whether it is loving the unlovely, going the second mile, enduring ridicule, battling illness or the fog that has held you captive… keep on spinning that blanket of tender compassion and you never know what good will come of it.

Don’t lose hope. With God, all things are possible. Let his love flow through you this Christmas season as you hang on to hope.