Lessons From the Buffalo

Last week we traveled to Yellowstone for a wonderful family vacation. We spent every day traveling in a national park, enjoying the contrast from life at home in Indiana. One major difference was that in Yellowstone, unlike any other thoroughfare in this country (like Interstate 80 when we were trying to get home), when you come upon traffic that is stopped, it is a very good and enjoyable thing.  When you see a string of cars stopped along the road, you know you are about to witness wildlife you wouldn’t normally see. One bull elk grazing can stop traffic for a very long time and nobody gets angry. They just join in to observe this massive animal having his lunch.

While we traveled, we listened to a couple of sermons that we missed during our vacation. (You can listen to them at http://thecreekonline.net/media.php?pageID=5). Chris spoke of our need to be a part of the Church; not just a gathering of friends with similar beliefs; not just a social gathering; not just a place to make us feel good about ourselves as we sacrifice our Sunday brunch; but a place where we can encourage each other and hold each other accountable and strengthen each other as together we face the struggles life presents.

As I listened, I was reminded of one of those traffic stops in Yellowstone. There were a dozen or more Buffalo with their calves grazing alongside of the road and with all the traffic stopping for a photo op, they eventually took advantage of the opportunity to cross the road. It was awesome!

After they had all gotten across and the last photo was snapped, I looked at the tree line 400-500 yards from the road and I saw movement. Eventually I could see that it was a buffalo cow and her calf and they were running like mad to get back to the herd.  A buffalo can run 45 mph so it was pretty amazing to witness. They didn’t slow down and the baby stayed right at her heals until they rejoined the herd.

This is the time of year when calves are young and wolves prey upon them. A pack of wolves is no concern to a herd that can surround their young, but one lone cow would be hard pressed to protect her calf against a large herd of hungry wolves. She knew the importance of being with the herd in order to ensure that her calf was safe and able to reach adulthood.

So, I want to ask you, WHO IS YOUR HERD?  Are you keeping company with those who will help you be a stronger, better, more dedicated God follower?  Do you isolate yourself from others and just do your own thing? Your kids are watching and following closely at your heals. They look to you for protection. They stay close and observe and gravitate to the types of people they see you hanging with. Are you allowing the Church to speak into your life in a real and life changing manner? Or are your friends outside of the church the ones you prefer because you can relax and your language and behavior won’t matter?

Accountability and responsibility are an integral part of the life of all who desire to walk with Jesus. I encourage you to find that person who is not afraid to tell you when you are drifting. BE that person that is willing to warn a friend when you see them falling out of step with the One who saved them. Embrace the Church… not just the place you go on Sunday because that’s how you were raised… but the movement that was born 2,000 years ago, out of the need for those who believed in a risen Lord to support and encourage one another. We need each other. We are definitely better together… and safer, too!

Generosity

Sunday’s sermon was about living a life that allows you to give whatever God asks of you because you trust Him completely to provide. Living outside of what others would consider the safety zone, because God has called you to meet a need. It was a great reminder that God is our provider and that walking with Him will allow us to be generous in a way that others would deem unsafe.

How do we teach that kind of generosity to our kids? It is easy to think that we don’t really have enough to share because raising a family is expensive. Looking at the bills vs. the income often leaves us thinking that we need to work a full-time or a second job so that we have some wiggle room.  My advice (and I am pretending you want it) would be to learn to live on less rather than living less.

If you are a parent, you have a calling… a number one priority… a vocation that is more important than anything you can ever do. You are to shape the heart and direct the steps of your child so they will learn that following Jesus is the best thing they can ever do. Nobody else has been called to be the spiritual guide for your child. Not the church, not the grandparents, not the private school.  It is YOU that needs to fill that position to the very best of your ability. Maybe you can do that and work full-time. Maybe you know that you are more effective in parenting when you are working part-time. Maybe your kids need you to be a full time parent. This is something that you work out as a couple so that you know that you are investing your time in the most effective manner when it comes to raising your kids.

Here are three tips to give you more wiggle room financially so you don’t feel trapped into working more hours and sacrificing time with the kids. FIRST, take a hard look at what you have. Do you need it? Last week as I was dusting my “stuff” I thought, “I don’t need that and it brings me no particular joy or evokes no special memories” and into the garage sale pile it went.  SECOND, Look at your monthly expenses. I don’t like the magazines articles that boast of teaching you how to shave $$ of your monthly expenses. They typically instruct me to stop spending money on something I already don’t spend money on! But, there are ways to cut expenses if you stop thinking, “well that is only $7 a week.” Look at every expense as if it matters, because it does. If going to the store or shopping online causes you to see things you didn’t know you wanted until you saw it, then STOP shopping. Only go to the store when you have to and stick to what is on your list. THIRD, look in your trash can. What is going to waste? Are you cooking too much? Are you using disposable things that cost you more than reusable things? Don’t make, take or use more than you need.

I am not trying to solve all your financial issues.  I just want you to find the joy of living within your means so that you can truly live generously. It is the best way to raise kids that will not feel entitled and selfish. So don’t get sucked into thinking that earning more is the answer to being more generous. Being generous with your time is critically important when raising your family. Working more hours will rob you of that, so see if you can’t find ways to carefully spend by asking yourself, “What do I have that I don’t need? What do I spend unnecessarily? What do I waste?” And live on less rather than living less!

Sanding

I painted my kitchen cabinets this year. They looked exactly as I had pictured them. At least for a week or so. Then the paint started to peel. I had spent plenty of time online getting advice from the “experts” before removing all the doors and sanding and wiping and priming and painting so I was really disappointed when they began to look a little too shabby, even for me. I like the weathered, primitive look, but am not a fan of the “you didn’t spend enough time prepping your wood and now its peeling” kind of look.

In raising children to be exactly as we had pictured them, there is also some figurative sanding that must be done. Kids come with some pretty rough edges and those are not going to go away by giving them puppies and lollypops. Some things require sandpaper if we want them to have a lasting finish. We don’t need to intentionally “sand” them because life presents those circumstances on a regular basis. We do, however, need to stop trying to shelter by constantly pacifying them rather than allowing them to self-sooth, protecting them rather than allowing them to experience the consequences of their behavior, rescuing them rather than allowing them to become problem solvers.

As hard as I try, I find myself rescuing too often. I really want to step back and let them learn, but I easily find myself looking for solutions to problems that aren’t mine to fix. Lately, God has been doing some “sanding” away at that harmful tendency. He has been reminding me that He has a plan and He can see the finished product and that beautiful end will require some sanding in the beginning. He is showing me that my kids are on a journey and the stops along their path may be painful, but the One who created them is able to take those experiences and use them to “sand” until they become who He designed them to be.

The Apostle Paul had quite a journey. It included blindness, beatings, shipwrecks, imprisonment and hardship beyond belief. Yet he didn’t become bitter. He found contentment because he knew that all of his experiences, good and bad, were being fashioned by the Creator into something beautiful. Paul’s life story is amazing because he discovered that “IN ALL THINGS”… yes ALL… “God works for the good of those who love Him” (Romans 8:28). Maybe your kids don't really "love" Him right now, but I am certain that those things they experience on their journey away from God will be used to their good when they return, so take courage and trust Him.

Guide your children through their journey. Help them when they need it and step back when they need to do it on their own. It is a hard line to find, but keep looking. Work together. Talk about it. In most 2 parent homes, there is a difference of opinion as to when there should be assistance and when they should be left to figure it out on their own. Those differences can … and do… cause friction. But they are wonderful differences if you stop trying to be “right” and start trying to allow God to use your differences to reshape the two of you into a terrific team. Kids aren’t the only ones who need sanding, you know.

Who Are You?

I loved Sunday’s sermon. In fact, I listened to it twice and you can listen to it here http://thecreekonline.net/media.php?pageID=5. Chris talked, in his message, about what adoption meant in the culture that Paul addressed when He spoke of being adopted into God’s family. It wasn’t the way we think of adoption in our society, where we rescue a child in need. Adoption would have been more like finding the right person to meet the need and fulfill the need of leadership in the adopting family. With the adoption came freedom from the old life with its debts and baggage, but also, the expectation of becoming the person who could lead; who could be an important part in providing what was missing in that family.

One of my favorite verses is Ephesians 2:10, which tells us that we are a masterpiece because we have been made new by our adoption into God’s family and we are to use that advantage to fulfill the plan He made long before we were born.  So often we see our “adoption” into Christianity as being saved from our past and receiving the gift of eternity with God. But, what about the responsibility to fulfill God’s plan in our new family? Who are YOU in His family?  Are you the prodigal child that squanders their inheritance and disregards your identity to find your own way? Or are you the one who stays close to the Father, but is missing the benefit of being His? Or are you eagerly seeking the plan He has for you as His child?

I’m not talking about following a creed or a set of rules. Adoption into God’s family is free and cannot be earned with good behavior. In the preamble to the Ten Commandments, God describes Himself as the One who rescued them from bondage. As a result of that act of love, God gave them guidelines on how to live in that freedom, with Him and with others. It wasn’t about giving rules of conduct. It was a gift to help them navigate life with God and others.

I am an adoptive mama. God gave us 4 beautiful children. Two of them through the miracle of birth; two that He selected in order to make our family complete. To bear children, there was no test, however, to adopt, we were tested, interviewed, and examined, in more ways than I knew you could look at a person, in order to adopt. Then, a committee recommended us, a judge approved us, and they became our forever children. Their names were changed. They were given new birth certificates that indicated they were born to us at the address where we lived on the date of their birth. It seemed odd to me that their past was blotted out, and with their new name, came a new heritage. I was now the one responsible to direct them and plan for their success.

Who are you? You are the heritage of your children. Give them good roots. Never miss an opportunity to show your kids the benefit of walking with their Creator. Help them to see that His plan for them is unique and perfect. Show them the joy of being in His presence so they will desire that above all else. Then let them go, when the time comes. Let them question and challenge and take their inheritance on the journey that may terrify you… because you can’t hold them or force them or guilt them into following the Leader. But the Leader has the power to go with them, watch over them, speak to them, and bring them home.

Hold them in your heart and in your prayers forever. That is what your Father has done for you.

The Rose or the Soil

They came in the mail today. Graduation Announcements. More will come, but the two I received today came from two of the most amazing young people with the grandest of potential. When I look at them I know that God will do great things in their lives, should they follow the path He has created for them. All who know them expect great things from them. They are bright, caring, attractive and loved by so many. If they follow the Leader, the world will change for the better for those who are blessed enough to be on the journey with them.

Hundreds of thousands of people will move their tassels in the next few weeks. Most will not stand out like these, but without a doubt, they have the same possibility of changing the world. They may not have a 4.0 and college may not be in their sites. They may not look like a hero to anyone or have the means to help those in need. They will, however, do grand and wonderful things if they find the path that God has laid out for them.

Often we are misled to believe that we must look, talk, believe, dress or live a certain way in order to be a contributor to God’s plan. In truth, His plan reaches to everyone to whom He has given life. We all have a purpose. We were all created to be a part of the plan that we cannot see. There is only one way to find our place in that plan and that is to walk closely with the One who designed it. “The rose or the poppy simply cannot steal the show. Without the soil and the sun and the nurture and the care, the rose or the poppy could never grow” (Ravi Zacharias, The Grand Weaver, 72).

Mom and Dad, what do you see when you look at your babies? Who will they become? You will help them to develop their areas of giftedness and overcome their areas of struggle. You will encourage them to excel at something and to do their best at all things. You are the soil that is nourishing this tender plant. The very best way to ensure their success is to show them the way to follow the Leader. Show them the joy that comes from knowing He loves and cares for His children. Show them the way He provides peace in the storm. Show them your grateful heart for all that He does in your daily life. Make Him real in your home by making Him the central filter through which all family decisions are made.

Whether they be the soil or the rose, may you be the guide they need to find God’s purpose for their lives.

People Before Politics

If you have ever spent much time with elementary school children you know that it is quite probable you will discover where their parents stand on the people, in or running for, a particular political office.  They speak with great candor and confidence as the bash or support this powerful icon. I have yet to meet a 3^rd grader who understands foreign affairs, global warming, or military strategies, yet they seem to know, unquestionably, what the person in office is doing wrong in these areas on a given day.  Why? Because they hear the conversations of the grown-ups and take it as the gospel truth and are more than willing to share it.

Conversely, it is almost as simple to guess the party of a high school student’s parents by listening to them talk… because they will often take the opposing party of their parents!  It’s natural for them to question. It’s normal for them to challenge. It means they are learning to think on their own and draw conclusions based on steering away from the status quo to find something that might work just a little bit better than the “rut” into which adults struggle to see their way out of.

I just wonder what would we hear on the playground from our politically savvy kids if, rather than bashing the people in our government, we were to take time every day to say a positive word about them and PRAY FOR THEM. What if we were to stop and think before we talk, realizing that we have not walked in the shoes of our leaders and don’t ever have all the details causing them to make the decisions they make?  What if our hearts were attuned to God’s and we saw these candidates and public officials as God’s children, who he loves? How would that change who our kids grow up to be? After all, is it really so important to embrace a political agenda in light of the significance of supporting the Great Commandment to love God and the second greatest command, according to Jesus…. to love our neighbor as ourselves?

It’s primary election day in Indiana. I am going to the polls to vote my conscience. Someone there will cancel out my vote. It is the way of democracy. But, I vow to pray for the one who loses and the one who wins and for all the little children who are listening to us. I will pray that  our country can change for the better because we are teaching our children to pray for, rather than criticize our leaders. It actually takes less energy and leaves you a lot less agitated.

“Remind the people to be subject to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready to do whatever is good, to slander no one, to be peaceable and considerate, and always to be gentle toward everyone. At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of   passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another.  But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit,  whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life.  This is a trustworthy saying. And I want you to stress these things, so that those who have trusted in God may be careful to devote themselves to doing what is good. These things are excellent and profitable for everyone.  But avoid foolish controversies and genealogies and arguments and quarrels about the law, because these are unprofitable and useless.”                                                                             Titus 3:1-9 NIV

Why Must They Suffer?

If you have been a parent very long, you know what it’s like to see your child suffer. It is one of the most difficult parts of parenting. You may have longed to take the pain yourself , if only it could relieve their pain. You may have felt bitter about the fact that an innocent child must suffer. The fact is, we don’t like hardship, especially when it is inflicted on a child.

Why do kids have to suffer? My first reaction to that is that the world they live in is broken. God created us to live in a perfect setting, of His design, but sin has changed that perfect world and it is broken. That broken condition created sickness and wickedness and pain. And it will remain so until we reach our heavenly home.

My second reaction is that kids have to suffer for the same reason adults have to suffer.

It grows them.  A baby who is held constantly never learns to self sooth. They learn to become more dependent and needy which creates more crying. Of course wisdom must be used to determine how long we should allow them to cry before we provided the comfort they legitimately need. But allowing them to discover that their anxiety is correctable even if they are not immediately rescued  helps them to grow to be problem solvers.

It teaches them. As your child grows, the pain they experience is often a result of their choices. When we rescue our kids from the consequences of their choices, we stunt their growth and they learn much more slowly. Allowing them to pay the price for their behavior is a great teaching tool. You can express to them how sad you are that they didn’t get to go to the birthday party, but that was their choice when they decided to disobey …again.

It molds them.  When they have truly felt the anguish of loss or disappointment or sickness, you have the opportunity to share with them that other people have the same pain and we can make their pain less if we walk alongside of them and show them compassion and concern.

It directs them. When their little hearts are breaking because they have been treated unfairly, this is the perfect setting for you to tell them about the God of justice and how He sees our suffering and longs to bring us comfort. Make sure that they know that Jesus is sad when we are sad. When they are struggling, let them know that they are not alone. God is waiting to help them through the mountains and the valleys of life. Even when they are all grown up.

You see, pain isn’t such a horrible thing when we realize that it is a tool God can use to shape us into the person who He created us to become. And all the pain in this life just makes the next life shine even brighter!

Your Starring Role

I have a cross-stitched sampler on my wall that states,   

“You can’t lead your children if you don’t know where you’re going.”

It makes me stop and think about my direction… my intentionality… the path that I have chosen. Life can get so full and busy that it is easy to forget there is a final destination we must strive for. Some would say that is heaven, but I prefer to consider my desired destination as fulfilling God’s plan for my life… then heaven is just the icing on the cake.

The question is, how do we manage a family and all that comes with it and still get the message across to our children that God has a plan for our lives and that we have an amazing hope for eternity because of a loving God and a risen Savior? Having the right words to say to them is important, but words are just words. You could tell them daily that the grass is purple and they would eventually remember those words. They may grow to believe that green is purple or they may just decide you don’t know what you are talking about.

The point is, as followers of Jesus we have a glorious hope for an eternity that will dissolve every concern and care that we have experienced here, in a moment. But does that hope translate to our kids? I’m afraid that what our kids see is our rushing about, our impatient responses, our worries about finances, our struggling relationships. They see one thing… our stress, yet we are telling them we believe that Jesus died for our sins and rose again and is preparing a place in heaven for us. Big deal!  They won’t want any part of that if it appears to be so miserable!

Are we so overwhelmed and consumed with this life that we seldom think of the life designed for us by a Sovereign God that will lead to an eternity with Him in paradise? We may as well be telling them that the grass is purple!  They are going to decide we haven’t a clue what we are saying or they will learn to believe that placing our hope in Jesus means nothing more that being busy and stressed out!

I would like to challenge you to allow the Holy Spirit to so engulf you, that even in the midst of the busyness, your children will be able to know that you are on a journey toward fulfilling a Divine plan in which you have a starring role. Let them know that God created you for a special purpose, to fulfill a plan that He made long ago… even before He made you.  Let them know that you are taking time in the Word so that you can know God better as you read His story. Let them know that you need some time for quiet so that God can speak to your heart and you can listen as He directs you toward your part in His plan.  Be in awe of the fact that the God who created the entire universe wants to have a forever relationship with YOU and let that seep into your life so that it can be seen in your smile and your eyes and your attitude.

Don’t worry so much about the words you say to them. Just make your actions and attitude reflect the amazing journey to fulfilling God’s divine plan for your life. I cannot imagine anything better than knowing that my kids are excited about finding where they fit in God’s plan. And knowing that they “caught” that from my enthusiastic pursuit… priceless!

Fresh Beginnings

Spring is a beautiful time of year when we see things that have been dead begin to show signs of life. The grass is green. The daffodils are beginning to bloom. The robins have returned and the children are playing outside, even though the temperatures are still a bit chilly. Spring cleaning has begun everywhere, inside and outside.

What does spring look like at your house? Are there things that need new life breathed into them? I have tackled a pile of clothes that needed to be mended. Dana is working on building in the new (1982ish) oven that is replacing the old one that finally died (1944ish). The craft corner has turned into a pile of rubble that prevents any creativity from taking place, so it is next on the radar.

New beginnings are a beautiful thing. In many areas of our lives we need to get rid of the things that are not providing value, not inspiring growth, not serving the purpose for you that they could for someone else. Likewise there are things we cling to that have lost value because they are not working as they were intended to work. Hanging on to things “just because” leads to the kind of clutter that keeps us from having the things that we truly need.

This is not just true of material things, but it also happens in our hearts.  Our relationships often suffer because we hold on to the old when we need to get rid of it. Old grievances; old memories of being hurt; old failures we still cling to.  As long as we harbor these things, we will not make room for the beautiful new life that God desires to bring into our homes.  Maybe it's time for a new beginning in your heart that will bring hope of a brighter future.

I would encourage you to take a good look in two areas of your world to do some housekeeping. One, your time... how is it being spent? I recently heard a young mother say that she was fasting from social media and when she would normally have picked up her phone to see what's happening in the lives of her friends, instead she would pick up her Bible or read a devotional. In the course of a week she was amazed at how much she had time to read and how much better and closer to God she felt. Take a look at what you can eliminate in order to find the time to know God better.

Two, your thoughts. The things we think... that we dwell on... often begin to create the feelings that drag us down and eventually end up as actions. When we are hurt, we tend to wallow around in self-pity. When we are offended, we put up walls. When we are falsely accused we harbor hatred. When we are envious, we sulk and stew. When we are confronted, we strike back.  When we think we are right, we stop listening to other ideas.

What if we would let go of the things that have been said about us or against us? What if we stopped thinking as the world thinks and instead allowed God to transform us by changing the way we think? What if we let things roll off our back and maybe even chuckle about the silliness of what would have angered us, back in the day? What if we just "let it go?"

My parents just celebrated their 63^rd wedding anniversary. If you ask my dad the secret to a long marriage, he will tell you, “You have to have a good forgetter. If something is said to you or about you that is negative, forget it! You are not really that bad.  If someone flatters you, forget that too, because you aren’t really that good. Just forget the things that pump you up or tear you down and be content to be the best person you can be today and a little bit better tomorrow.”

I would say that is pretty good advice for making a fresh new life this spring. Have your “forgetter” overhauled so that you can focus on being the new creation God wants you to be. Give your schedule a fresh coat of paint and push aside whatever is distracting you from growing closer to God and watch your family benefit from the change in you!

Happy April!  Even if it is snowing... 

The Greatest Love

As one who has been ministering to children for a number of years I have grown accustom to breaking down scripture into nuggets of truth that a child can grasp and then find ways to apply those truths to their lives. When it comes to the story of Easter, I struggle to even grasp it myself. I have heard the story all my life. I know about the Passover and the palm branches. I know about Judas and Gethsemane. I know about Pilate and Herod. I know about the beatings and the betrayals. I can explain what a child needs to know about these things so they understand, in their own childish way.

Here is where I struggle. The entire basis of the Christian faith is the Cross. The sacrifice of God incarnate (God in flesh) is our saving grace. I can tell about it just like the Bible records it. I can even sound a bit pastoral. The problem is, I don’t understand it. I cannot comprehend a love so great that such a sacrifice would be made. It’s not that I don’t understand sacrifice. I know giving up the carpet you need so that your kid can have braces or giving up a good job to be a stay at home mom. I can relate to sacrificing a nice car so that you can find your way out of debt. I know the sacrifice of giving up your vacation to help those in need. All of that makes sense to me. What I don’t get is that the God of the universe…. the One who holds the power to create and destroy all things… willingly allowing mere humans to disregard and disrespect His deity to the point of perpetrating His excruciating and demoralizing murder. He allowed Himself to be the victim after He willingly left heaven to take on flesh so He could reconcile God and humanity…. I just can’t wrap my mind around that.

Would we not break off a relationship with those who do so much less against us? Wouldn’t we walk away and think well of ourselves for not allowing someone to walk all over us? Here is our Creator and our Redeemer, who had the power to change the whole plan of salvation, yet he stayed the course and brought about the plan that was always in place to purchase our pardon. Why? Well, the only reason anyone would submit themselves to such cruelty for the sake of all is LOVE… but not just a love that we feel for our kids or our sweetheart… a love that we cannot begin to grasp.

Why would He do that for me? Why not just change it up a bit, sprinkle everyone with forgiveness dust and call it square? Because of LOVE. Love was never intended to take the easy way out. LOVE requires a sacrifice. In your marriage, if you truly love… you make sacrifices for your spouse. As a parent, your love causes you to make sacrifices for your children. As our parents age, we make sacrifices for them.

This Easter, take a good look at the Story of God’s inexplicable love for you. Draw closer to the One who didn’t have to give anything, but chose to give everything. Let that unfathomable love overtake you. Allow it to seep in to your mind and spirit and accept what is impossible to understand in your finite mind. Grab hold of the love that reconciles you to your Savior and commit to walking in His love until He takes you home.

Compelled to Obey

Have you ever been frustrated by the energy you spend trying to direct the behavior of your children? At different ages there are different  issues, but we never stop giving direction and it seems they never stop challenging us. If only our children could measure the love we have for them and see how boundless it is, they would surely begin to grasp that all of our instructions are for their good.  It is our life’s work to mold and shape them and make them new.

In order to be a success as a parent we have to get our kids to leave their childish ways behind and realize that being a productive adult involves walking away from the ego-centric life of their infancy. That behavior has to be left behind forever.

Next we must help them to see that first-time obedience is imperative.  Often they will take the time to ponder the outcome and weigh the consequences before they decide to respond positively to our directives. If we are to help them grasp the critical nature of immediate obedience to our instructions, we have to be consistent with our discipline. Failure on our part to follow through teaches them that our words are not trustworthy.

After we have laid out the path away from their inbred self-centeredness and taught them to obey consistently, their actions and attitudes begin to reflect the goodness that God intends for all of us. They will begin to notice the needs of others and become a good citizen, contributing positive thoughts and actions to those around them.

Interestingly, these are the very steps Paul shares with the new followers in 2 Corinthians 5.

Vs. 14  tells us that it is Christ’s love that compels us to follow Him. We realize that His death shows us His boundless love and His resurrection shows us His power to transform us.  Our love must also be transformative in the lives of our children. Our love gives them the desire to follow. Rules without love and grace will push them away. Love them enough to change their focus and show them the right attitudes and behaviors. You are their #1 teacher in life.

Vs. 15 teaches us that we must walk away from our own selfish desires and allow him to guide our way… our thoughts… our attitudes… our actions. The same thing we are working on with our children, God is working on in His children.

Vs. 17 explains that being IN CHRIST causes us to be made new. We are no longer obedient to the desires that trip us up, but belonging to Jesus, we obey Him without question.

Vs. 20 describes us as Christ’s ambassadors, making the appeal to the world to follow the God who made them, loves them and designed a plan for their lives. The world will see God in us and follow because He is love, mercy and grace.  Isn’t that what you want your kids to see?

I challenge you today to let God transform you so that you can become His ambassador to your children. Grow with them. Learn and teach. Accept love and give love. You will not do anything more important… EVER!

The Standard

As parents, we all want the best for our kids. Nothing at all wrong with that. But, think for a moment about who has set the bar for what is “the best” in your home. There are only 2 sources for setting that standard. The WORLD or The WORD.  Often the two are at odds with each other.

Last week we had the pleasure of spending a day with an Amish family I had come to know on one of Dana’s hospital stays. There is something about their lifestyle that has always intrigued me and I wasn’t afraid to ask a lot of questions and began to learn how their standard for family life differed from ours, such as…

Several of the teen children were absent because they were at a volleyball tournament. I had shared with them that our grandson had recently competed at the state level in swimming and we had gone to watch him. They shared with me that, for them, sports are important for the children as a source of exercise and recreation, but the parents are never involved in that. Drivers are hired and parents tend to their daily responsibilities so there isn’t the strain on the home. Then when the children grow up they have adult responsibilities and the sports are all left behind.  

At mealtime they all sat around the table (not the television) – there were 3 generations present- and they silently bowed and asked God’s blessing on the food at the direction of the patriarch of the family, who ended the time of prayer with an “amen.” During the meal, there was laughter and conversation and a great deal of joy (and delicious food, of course). There were 17 of us around their ample table from age 3 to 73 and all remained seated until the grandfather said, “Let’s thank God for what we have eaten.”  And all bowed and silently thanked God and quietly left the table as they finished.

For entertainment, of course there was no TV or video games, but we listened to the children sing and do their rhythmic hand clap routines, while the older boys went out to shoot baskets. The sound of their harmony, at age 11, gave me goosebumps. It was beautiful. They showed us their home, which other than the gas lights, was more modern and lovely than our home, by far! They spoke of the children and their church families and how they take care of one another. When we told them how our church had gathered and prepared the food and roofed our home last fall, they were amazed. They didn’t know that the English  did things like that. We were thrilled to tell them about the great people of Mill Creek Church.

There was some discussion about the upcoming presidential election. A great deal of concern was expressed because of what they had read about the front-runners in the paper, but that concern was punctuated with the comment, “God is our president and we answer to Him.” 

We English may look upon the Amish as backward and stubborn, refusing to accept “progress.”  However, I quickly learned they have progressed when I noted the indoor plumbing and hot water and all the furnishings and pictures on the walls of their warm and comfortable home, heated with hot water under their ceramic tiled floors. The difference is that the church leaders are the ones to guide them in that progress… not society.  They determine what will be best for the families they serve based on their interpretation of Scripture and time spent in prayer.

I just keep thinking about that. At what point do we take a stand, as they have, and say we will not conform to society, but will look to God’s Word for the direction we will take with our children in our homes?

I hope I never have to make all the clothing for my family members or live through a summer with gas lights and no central air, but I am ready to take good look at ways in which I have conformed to the standards of a very sick society and get back to placing my hope and faith in the Lord and the Truth I find in His Word.