What Do You Think?

 The way we think has great power to control the outcomes of our lives. The human mind is a stage where drama loves to play and the drama that is created there, whether consciously or unconsciously, has the potential to make us or break us. It has the potential to orchestrate success or failure in our human interactions, our relationships, our job performance, our homes and our overall well-being. 

The brain is a powerful organ, often referred to as the computer that controls the entire body and all of its systems. The mind, being the drama that it is, likes to short-circuit that magnificent organ and cause it to work less effectively on our behalf. This explains why medical professionals have determined that more than half of the ailments in the human body stem from stress... which is the drama that the mind creates with which to hijack the healing powers of the brain. 

If you don't believe me, then why were we afraid of the ocean after watching Jaws? Why did the noises in the utility closet sound like raptors after watching Jurassic Park? Why was it so hard to trust my husband back in the days when I "treated" myself to 2 days of soap operas a week?  I am certain I am not alone in this struggle. You, too, have had your mind mess with you at some point.

So if your mind is playing out a scene of distrust, sorrow, worry and strife; jealousy, envy, anger and bitterness, and you don't get up an walk out on that performance, your brain will send a legion of  neurons that will cause your body to react in negative ways. But, what if you were to close the curtain and fire the cast and shut down the show. What if, instead you decided on a whole new drama where the outcomes align with the promises in scripture? What if you truly believed that you could be a new person with a new life and a new found love and passion for your spouse? What if you believed that you could master the thing that you've been struggling with? What if you believed that you could be a success and impact the world in a positive way? It would be a game changer, for sure.

As I concentrate on the mind and it's potential to alter our lives, I think of Paul's instruction for us to wear the whole armor of Christ to conquer the battles waged by evil. I believe that it is no coincidence that he chose to have us wear the helmet of salvation in order to protect the "computer" that controls our movements and our health and well-being. When our salvation is secure, we have the power of God within us to conquer whatever life brings us, so why do we need a helmet to protect us? Perhaps because God knew that the drama in life that can bring us good times, can also strip away the truth by firing lies at us. The world is full of such lies and without protecting ourselves from those lies and all that drama, we will not live victoriously and abundantly as God's Word promises. We are easily dragged down by the thoughts planted in our mind by the enemy and he will use that stage to do terrible damage and kill our effectiveness as parents, as husbands, as wives, as followers of Jesus.

Bringing this message home, I encourage each of you to take note of the drama in your mind and act immediately to capture every rebellious and unhealthy thought and make it submit to Jesus Christ who is our Truth (2 Corinthians 10:1-6). If it does not build up your marriage, if it does not help you parent in a Godly manner, then close the curtain and change the scene to the thoughts that will bring healing and wholeness to your home. Look for thoughts that are true, honorable, right and pure. Focus on what is lovely and admirable and excellent and worthy of praise (Philippians 4:8) and see where those thoughts will take you. Let God transform you, your home, your marriage and your family dynamics by changing the way your think.

Are You A Carrier?

"Carry each other's burdens and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

Galatians 6:2

I am a doer. I like it when I can see a need and can charge in with (what I perceive to be) my unlimited strength and wisdom and alleviate the burden I see someone carrying. So, I like this verse. It fits who I am and justifies my drive to go fix things. I recently had the opportunity to use this drive by flying out to Montana to spend a week with our youngest son, Kyle, after his skiing accident left him with a punctured lung, lacerated liver and 5 broken ribs. I quickly discovered there was nothing there that I could fix. I bought some grocery and made some drug store runs, fixed a few meals, did laundry and arranged pillows. I was going there to "fix" something I couldn't fix.

Of course "fixing" others is a total misinterpretation of that verse. I couldn't fix broken bones or take his pain away, but what I could do was just be there. Offering hope and love. His reaction to my "non-fixing presence"... words of love and gratitude for being with him that week.  For a "fixer" that was such a great reminder that there is a big difference between carrying a burden and making it disappear. We are not called to fix what we didn't break, but to love enough to walk alongside someone who is broken. 

How does this message translate at home? As a young mom (and a fixer), every moment was a teachable moment. There was a lesson to be learned with every mistake or flagrant foul the kids committed. I wonder now if they would have learned just as well if I had just silently allowed them to suffer the consequences of their choices without judgement or sermon, but walked alongside them in love while the dust settled around their misdeed. We start off life with an infant, bearing ALL the burden for them because they need us to do that. As they grow, we have to back off and allow them to carry the burden for themselves so they can learn to master life skills. If you read further in Galatians 6, you will find Paul telling his readers to bear their own burdens. In today's vernacular, we should never be the enabler who confuses bearing another's burden during a difficult time with carrying their entire load, absolving them of responsibility. My take on this is that we allow our kids to feel the pain of bad decisions, but rather than standing over them with condemnation, we sit beside them with compassion. After all, has it really been that long since you screwed up?

While I was in Montana, I talked with a young wife who told me that her grandmother was very old school and believed that the wife should serve her husband and care for him, even though he was perfectly capable of caring for himself. She didn't like that concept at all! They were a few years into their marriage and content to care for themselves. What happens, though, when there is a pain that visits the heart that sets us back on our heels? When a roadblock appears out of nowhere causing us to stop dead in our tracks? When sickness or loss is suffered? Rushing in to tell your partner to suck it up and be strong is not typically the best way to healing. Busying yourself with "fixing" will also not do a thing for your relationship. Pointing out how they got themselves into this situation or refusing to show compassion because they deserve whatever the outcome will certainly not strengthen your relationship. The best way to bear your spouse's burden is to know your spouse. Living for yourself will not enlighten you to the person you have chosen and what their needs might be. You simply cannot bear their burden if you don't know them well enough to know who they are inside. Truly knowing them enables you to try to out-serve each other. That may feel awkward in the beginning if it isn't your typical method, but it is an excellent way to build a relationship that lasts.

Bottom line... life can get tough and sometimes we just aren't up to the struggle... whether we are 6 or 60. Sometimes we need someone to help shoulder our load. There are no awards at the end of the road for going it alone or forcing someone else to do so. The Law of Christ is to love others and love God. We can't love God if we don't love what He created....(and that's your spouse and your kids). The way to demonstrate your love for them, according to scripture, is to carry their burden. It may seem to you that they should be able to manage without you, but what a blessing it is when they see you are by their side, walking with them through their valley. You don't need a lot of knowledge to sit with someone and listen. You don't need to quote scripture or have the wisdom of a sage. You just have to care that they hurting or afraid and hold their hand in the valleys of life. The darkness is always more bearable when you are not alone.

Not Shackles But Shelter

"Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart,

and you will find rest for your souls.

For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Matthew 11:28-30

Why do we choose to be angry rather than to understanding? Or to be envious rather than grateful? Or to be bitter rather than forgive? To be weary rather than rest? To be burdened rather than to trust? It just seems to be our default setting to accept pain  as reality rather than seek the cure. Jesus said that we will have suffering in this life, but He never said we had to hold on to it tightly and be completely miserable. 

The above passage can easily be brought home.  Think of your marriage or other relationships that have you worn down, weary, burdened, exhausted. How likely are you to take that to Jesus and accept His rest from that burden? Aren't we more inclined to stew about it, share it with our co-workers, put it on social media, confide in ALL of our dearest friends than we are to simply come to Jesus with it? Perhaps it is because we have read the next sentence: Take MY YOKE UPON YOU... and we see that yoke as a form of bondage. A giving up of our free will. A shackle that keeps us from doing things our way. Not that "our way" has much merit or has brought any relief to the stress growing into a broiling volcano under our roof.

But, there is so much to be gained by taking that yoke. You get to snuggle in close and learn from the LORD himself. Learn the rhythm of His movement. Learn the joy of His presence. Learn the gentleness that builds relationships. Learn the humility that comes when we finally see the log in our own eye when we were angry over the speck in our rivals. And learn the rest that comes when His grace completely covers that log up and moves us forward.

The reason His yoke is easy is because, when yoked in partnership with Him, we no longer carry the weight of judging others. That belongs on His side and is too heavy for us to carry. We don't have to hold any grudges because vengeance belongs to Him. It will crush us if we try to shoulder it. We don't have to withhold love and affection because when we walk in sync with Him, we learn that love is unconditional and there is no exception. We don't have to keep track of the score, but can find rest knowing that He has seen it all. 

Is there stress in your home that is wearing you down? Is your family life doing pretty well? Either way, may I encourage you to take a look at that yoke. It isn't what you might think. It's not about bondage. It is a tool for rest. His yoke is not like shackles, but like a shelter from stress you were never meant to carry. Come. Take. Learn. Rest.

Never Alone

I am sitting at a computer in the lobby of the hotel where I am staying in Big Sky, Montana. Out of my window I can see Lone Peak, the mountain my son was skiing down when he collided with a tree at about 25 mph. He was not alone on the Mountain that day. He was with friends, but the Friend that was with him that kept him from more serious injuries than a lacerated liver, punctured lung and 5 broken ribs has never left his side in all the years he has been away from my watchful eye.

I am ever so grateful that God protected him. I am also extremely grateful for the prayers that have been offered for him in all the days since the accident... however many that might be. I don't even know what day it is. Let's blame it on the altitude here!

I belong to a special family. Not a perfect family. We come in all shapes and sizes and have all sorts of history of unfortunate choices and warts and secrets. But, we are family because we are united by a belief that we are not alone. That each of us matters to a loving God who made us each for a purpose and has His hand on our lives. That family has reached out to me multiple times a day to check on Kyle and check on me. What a calming effect that has had on me through the hours since I got that phone call.

Kyle will heal. It will be a long process, but he will know every single day that he is here because the Head of this amazing family chose to give him another chance at life. He is already planning the slopes he will conquer next year... and I hope he will always remember the family that prayed him through this.

I am so thankful for you all. I am so thankful that my heritage is one that taught me the importance of belonging to a family of faith. I am so blessed to have known many "family" members who have so positively impacted my life... especially this week as I look at the grand view of snow covered mountains of Montana and do important things... like put socks and shoes on a grown man and remind him just how much he is loved.

The Wonders Of His Love

The Christmas Carol, “Joy to the World,” proclaims the truth that…

“He rules the world with truth and grace and makes the nations prove the glories of His righteousness and wonders of His love…”

Made in His image, we are most comfortable, peaceful and joy-filled when we demonstrate the wonder of His love in our lives. And that requires large doses of grace.

When things are forgotten or errors made, there is a choice that must occur. Judgment and anger or grace and laughter. That is how it works in our house. We have learned that a chuckle and a hug when grace is extended is a whole lot more fun than a condemning, angry spirit. Because frankly, today it is his mistake, but tomorrow it will likely be mine. We all need grace at some point, so we may as well learn to extend it and accept it.

Loving like that makes all the difference. Yesterday a woman told me that I am the only wife she knows that speaks so well of her husband after over four decades together. It isn’t because Dana is perfect that I can say wonderful things about him. It is because he showers me with grace when I need it and I do the same for him. We don’t always get it right, but getting it wrong makes us rush back to grace because it feels so much better! This year, may your home and heart be filled with the wonder of His love and grace because ....

Marriage is most appealing when grace is most apparent.

Amazing Grace

It has been over a year since I heard him say it, but he said it often enough that it is etched in my memory – the sincerity of his voice and the imploring look in his eyes. “The message at my funeral is not stories of my virtue, but of God’s grace.” Dad, if you knew him well, was not a man who even seemed to need grace. For as long as I can remember he was kind and wise and generous and all things good. But, he was adamant. “I am nothing without the grace of God. I accomplish nothing of value without His saving grace.” He understood fully that we truly are empty shells of good intentions… or devious schemes… until God’s grace begins to mold us into what we are to become for His story, and His glory.

It is true. He was right. God’s grace is essential for each of us. It is the beginning of shaping us into the person that He made us to be…the particular purpose He has for us to fulfill. We can’t achieve it with our good intentions or with our knowledge or with consistent practice. His grace is the ingredient that gives us moldability. It is what enables us to be supple clay in the hands of the Potter. It removes the hardened stones that prevent our spiritual formation; that keep us from being a vessel that His Spirit can inhabit. It softens us with living water, cleansing the inherit sin that hides our true worth.

Here is the truth about grace. It is a gift that transforms us if we are willing to be transformed. It is not a blanket forgiveness policy that enables us to continue to live according to our desires or seek to fulfill our plans regardless of God’s will. If His grace doesn’t bring about a new life for us then we have refused the gift He came to bring. If your kids kept repeating the same offense and you constantly extended grace without consequences, they would not grow and mature and develop into responsible adults. If your spouse extends grace to you, but you never change the behavior that hurts them, that grace accomplished nothing other than an increase in bad behavior and more pain in your relationship.

This Christmas take a tip from my Dad. Allow God’s grace to transform you… your marriage… your family… your relationships. Stop trying to accomplish perfection by what you do or don’t do. Instead, let the grace He came to bring begin to shape you into that person that makes you appear to not even need grace! It worked for my Dad! Don’t kid yourself into believing that your efforts are enough. We are nothing without the grace that is a free gift from God. Accepting His life-changing grace will change everything! That’s why it’s called AMAZING!

Redeeming Grace

Silent Night! Holy Night!

Son of God, Loves pure light

Radiant beams from Thy Holy face

With the Dawn of Redeeming Grace

Jesus Lord at Thy birth

Jesus Lord at Thy birth

These are the familiar words of the third verse of the Carol we all know as Silent Night, written by Father Mohr and set to music by Franz Gruber in 1818 in a little village in Austria. Have you ever really paid attention to those words? In them we can find the true significance of God, wearing the clothing of human skin, coming to earth to bring Light and Grace. That very first Christmas was the beginning of a story of Grace that has changed the lives of all who have accepted it.

Grace is a beautiful thing. It is the granting of a pardon where it is unearned and undeserved. Perhaps this comes about by the miraculous ability to see things through the eyes of another. In his message on Sunday, the Pastor stated that, “Grace is the unsettling solution for just about everything.” Imagine how our relationship dynamics could change, how our arguments could be tamed, how our marriages could be impacted if showered with grace. I am not sure how that would look for everyone else, but for me, extending grace begins when I can grasp that my perspective is not the only perspective in the house that is of value. When I am able to look at the history of another person and allow myself to feel what they must be feeling to create the behaviors they are exhibiting, it truly changes my response to them. People aren’t just arbitrarily nimrods. There is a reason behind their words and actions. Imagine what it may be, if you don’t know, and let that transform the way you feel about them.

“But he doesn’t deserve it!” “She made this mess, now she can reap the consequences.” If you were wondering if you are a grace-filled person, I propose that if those sentences are a foundational part of your mindset, the answer is NO. Grace sounds like, “He may not deserve my best, but I am giving it anyway,” or “She really messed this up, but I feel like I have made some mistakes, too, and I should help her correct it.” Is it easy? Nope! In fact, the literal verse from the pen of Father Mohr says,

Silent Night! Holy Night!

Brought the world peace tonight,

From the heavens’ golden height

Shows the grace of His holy might

Jesus, as man on this earth!

Jesus, as man on this earth!

If you are a little short of “Holy Might” you may want to ask God for the strength it takes to extend the grace that is needed in order to bring healing to your home. It is far simpler to give a cold shoulder and not build a strong relationship. But, in the end, all you have is the end if you are unwilling to shower others with grace.  

“The Word [Story of God] became flesh and made his dwelling among us.

We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, 

who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.”

John 1:14

Since we are created in His image, perhaps we will find our greatest fulfillment when we are full of grace and truth. What a wonderful Christmas gift to give to your family!

Thankful

Sunday the Pastor challenged us to tell the story of someone who has made your life better. What a wonderful Thanksgiving tradition to begin. My list of people who have blessed and enriched my life is so incredibly long that it would exceed the maximum word limits for this blog! But, you know who you are and you know I love you so much for just being YOU!

The person whose story I want to tell in this blog is my husband. I feel like you need to know a bit of our back story, because as I tell you all the reasons my life is better because of Dana, you may think I am “lucky” or we are “unique” or that we “married well.” Truthfully, we have been a mess, lost and basically dumb!  We dated all through my high school years. It was a rocky, immature relationship. We got married too young. Kids came before we were financially prepared (or prepared in just about any possible way). He was selfish. I was passive aggressive and manipulative. We were both awful at communication. Neither of us had a shining example of what marriage should look like, but we both wanted something that resembled happily every after. We had a lot to learn, and we did, primarily by trial and error… emphasis on error! We knew more of what NOT to do than what we should do. So, we plugged away, through tears and laughter. There were times when I just wanted to walk away, but we stuck it out and grew in many ways.

Fast forward 46 years from that first date… and I can say that I am blessed so much more than I deserve by the man that has learned to love me so well. Dana is a fixer. Especially of mechanical things. He can fix anything! We seldom have to call a repair man. It make sense to him, as if there was a blueprint in his head of things he has never seen before. I, however, am not a mechanical object. Almost five decades later, he is still searching for the blueprint in his head to tell him how to fix what is hurting or frustrated in me. And, I am a woman so that’s pretty much a moving target! Because he can’t “fix” me, he will often wait silently for me to process enough to be able to tell him what I think I need. I once read his silence as indifference. But, his love and dedication to me have taught me otherwise. He will never be gushy romantic who reads my mind and has the right words written in the sky for me. And that’s fine with me because I know that whatever I need, he will do his best to provide it… if I can find a way to tell him what it is.

I am so very thankful to have a husband who consistently puts my needs ahead of his (just as soon as he figures out what they are) and who helps me grow into a better person. If he always met my needs immediately, I would never have learned to communicate.

I am thankful to have the companionship of a man who will, on occasion, switch from a football game to a Hallmark Movie and snuggle on the love seat with me.

I am thankful to have a man that is willing to work extra hard in a cold garage to fix things rather than take money out of savings to pay someone else to do it.

I am thankful to be with a man who left a substantial income, successfully climbing the corporate ladder to follow the call of God and do something that gave him more time with his family and made an eternal difference in the lives of others.

I am thankful to have a husband that can change a diaper, wash dishes, run a vacuum and make the coffee every morning and never complain about it.

I am thankful to have a husband who partners with me in ministry and is (in my opinion) the most gracious, warm and welcoming man at Mill Creek, even though he is truly an introvert!

I am thankful that my guy believes in me and gives me courage to do what I would never attempt to do on my own… like travel alone to Australia for a 3 month mission trip or let people see my artwork (truly both of those things are equally terrifying to me).

I am thankful for a man that affirms me. He seldom tells me I am amazing or strong or good, but his goodness to me has been such a constant that I have learned to read between the lines and find the affirmation that I need. And, when I can’t find it, I have learned that it is okay to ask and he will reassure me that I am enough.

I am thankful for Dana Brady, not because he always gets it right, but because he knows the value of allowing God to transform us into a new creation. He knows that there is more than one way to see things and he is willing to let God’s transforming power alter the way he thinks; the way he sees others; the way he finds truth; the way he loves.

This blog post is already too long so I dare not continue to tell more of his wonderful attributes, but please know, if your marriage is less than ideal, that there is something for which you can be thankful… even if it is a deficiency in them that helps you become a stronger, better person. Look for the good. It’s there!

I love you, Dana Brady, and am so thankful for you!

God's Plan

It just makes sense that the God who proclaimed that all He created is good, would waste nothing. 

He made all things for a purpose.

He allows all things for a purpose.

We experience all things for a purpose. 

When you think about it, sin and brokenness create circumstances that are not lovely; some are heinous, some painful, some practically intolerable. Did God make those things? I don't think so... but He allowed them to happen ... for a purpose. And He believes in YOU and desires for you to seek His purpose... to seek HIM... in the middle of it all and there you will find answers.... or maybe you will not find answers, but you will find Him.

Consider these possibilities...

When the kids are out of control, His plan may be to grow you into the parent that will teach them appropriate behavior. If they never disobeyed, you never grow as a parent.

When your spouse is not meeting your needs, His plan may be for you to learn better communication and perhaps look at things from a different perspective. That's what grows a marriage.

When your job situation is unbearable, His plan may be for you to lean on Him for the wisdom you need. He shapes us most in adversity.

When a loved one is suffering and your heart is breaking, His plan may be for you to learn His compassion and to let Him handle what is simply too big for you to manage. Trust Him!

When finances are a disaster, His plan may be for you to discover how little you need and how much you truly have. When He is all we have we often discover He is all we need.

When illness comes at the worst possible time, His plan may be for you to slow down and listen.

When friends fail you, His plan may be for you to seek a stronger relationship with Him. 

No matter how difficult life may seem today, know this... God isn't perplexed by it, but has already discovered the way around it, through it, over it or under it. When you are a follower of the God who IS LOVE you can be assured that He will make a way and you will be shaped by your circumstances in a manner that will help you through life, this side of heaven. He refuses to throw up His hands when your choices have landed you in a difficult spot. Instead, He will teach you with grace and you will come through it as you listen and grow and walk with your hand in His.

So, as many wise people have said, when you can't find your way through a difficult situation, simply do the next right thing and, according to the Apostle Paul, that is to be thankful for every circumstance. Even if it is unpleasant or downright intolerable! It is God's plan for you to be thankful because you know that He loves you and will never ever stop. Take a deep breath. Say a prayer of thanksgiving. God's got this!

To Share Or To Bury?

Thanksgiving is only a week away and I have been thinking about all the food to purchase and the baking to be done and almost all of the family together. I love it! We always have so much food and when we are finished eating there is still plenty to send home with everyone. I think it's a mom thing to want to feed people well.

And speaking of feeding....I have been in ministry for a lot of decades and one thing I have heard many times as a reason to remain or leave a church has to do with "being fed." If we are fed, we stay. If we are not being "fed," we leave and go elsewhere to find food. I totally get it. God would have to really work to convince me to stay at a church with dry, meaningless teaching... or where I didn't feel a connection with anyone... or where they didn't serve coffee (Kidding!). But, church becomes the Church when we all participate in the lives of others, rather than just pulling up to the table and stuffing our face with the richness of the Word.

In the sermon Sunday, Chris talked about the parable of the talents in Matthew 25 and how Jesus wasn't just speaking of gifts or resources as we may think, but also of experience and information and wisdom and life skills. All the things that we gain through the years as we walk with the Lord. Every week we come back to take in more and more, being fed the richest spiritual food around, but if that "meal" isn't strengthening us to serve, we are not building the Church. We are essentially burying our talents in order to keep them "safe."

If you are reading this and are part of a congregation that is feeding you and you aren't using that nourishment to serve others and grow God's Kingdom, how are you different from the servant who buried his talent and didn't grow it for the Master? Hoarding the Truth you have learned is exactly what the servant did with the one talent he was given.

If we bring it home, what are you doing under your own roof to put into practice the truths you are learning at church? When the pastor speaks about loving others, running to the messy places to be the hands and feet of Jesus, and you nod in agreement but then stay in your comfortable home, with your beautiful children without regard to where God could be using you every week, you bury your talent, because you have received a truth but do nothing with it. What are your children learning about being a follower of Jesus if you take His truth and hide it in your heart .... so deeply that it never turns into action? During times of tension between you and your spouse or kids, do your kids see you work through it with the love you acknowledged on Sunday? Or do their see rage and bitterness boiling?

Perhaps your children are grown and you feel pretty secure that you have served and "done your time" by teaching a class when they were young. If you feel comfortable coming to church to be fed and are not feeding others from your wisdom and knowledge and life experience gained through the years, then you are missing the point of being nourished from the Truth of Scripture. We are ALL called to be disciples that make disciples. And there is no retirement plan for that. How are you doing in that arena?

God isn't looking for Biblical scholars or people who live in spectacular, spotless homes that always smell of homemade bread and chocolate chip cookies. He is looking for people who have been fed to open their arms and their hearts and their calendars enough to allow Him to create a connection for you. There are so many people at church that come and never get connected and never even feel invited to the table because we get there first and don't set a place for them.

So, what are you doing with what you know? Are you learning how to follow Jesus? Are you teaching others what you know? What does He see when He looks at your investment of time, knowledge, wisdom, life experience? Is it at all important to you to invest that, rather than bury it? I can tell you one thing for sure...

It is important to Jesus.

Giving Love - Giving Life

In the spirit of Thanksgiving, have you thanked God for the beautiful sunrise this morning or the changing seasons that make Indiana a special - though unpredictable- place to live? Did you thank Him for the furnace that kicks on to keep you from suffering in the cold? Have you thanked Him for those in your tribe that make you laugh or tell you the truth that you need to hear? Have you thanked Him for the food in your fridge or the people around your table? Have you thanked Him for the person who is willing to go to work every day to provide for your needs or the job that helps you to have the things that most of the world would consider luxuries? Chances are, you have all those things for which to give thanks, which by the world's standard, makes you rich. So I am following the instructions of the Apostle Paul in 1 Timothy 6: 17-19 and teaching...

"...those who are rich in this world not to be proud and not to trust in their money, which is so unreliable. Their trust should be in God, who richly gives us all we need for our enjoyment."

This is your public service reminder that God is your provider, not your boss or your job or your bank account. God is the own who makes all things possible so that your needs can be met and He wants you to enjoy His provision for you.

This verse, however, doesn't just speak to me of His provision for our physical needs. There is more that God provides for our enjoyment. Our relationships would be high on that list. Our connection with the world outside of our comfort zone, perhaps across the globe. Perhaps just across town. There are suffering children who are in need of clean water to drink or a warm coat for the winter. Are you living in a way that allows you to help in some small way, or are you extended beyond your means so that you can't bless those in need?

 "Tell them to use their money to do good.

 They should be rich in good works and generous to those in need,

 always being ready to share with others. " 

So I am again taking the instruction of Paul and asking if you would be willing to give up Starbucks for a month or cable for a month or take your clothing budget for a month or remove unhealthy food from your shopping list so that you can give that money to someone in need? Maybe you can give without sacrificing any of those things. Great! But what if you couldn't? Would your heart join with the heart of God in caring for those you don't even know and loving enough to sacrifice for them and use your money to do good?

Let's bring that closer to home. What about when the people right under your roof are in need of things less tangible? They are fed and clothed and given more than anyone truly needs. But, what about their emotional needs? What about their need to know they are forgiven, loved, valued for their uniqueness? Perhaps that is the most pressing need in your family. Are you willing to break down the walls you have erected over time to protect yourself and truly give yourself - your whole self to loving generously? I know that you are afraid of being hurt or rejected, but sitting alone behind that wall is a self-inflicted loneliness that brings its own pain. 

My prayer for you and your family this holiday season is that you would be willing to be rich in love and generous to those who need that love, including yourself. Share your love. Share generously. Open yourself up to receive the love you have been rejecting because... according to the writer of most of the New Testament,

By doing this they will be storing up their treasure 

as a good foundation for the future so that they may experience true life."

Give love ~ Give life ~ Make a better future

When Your Tank Is Empty

There are times in every marriage when we feel that our emotional tank is empty. Kids, busy schedules, lack of time to connect, a partner that is completely unaware of your needs. All this and more play a part in draining our tanks. Yet, we are commanded to love each other. Honor others above ourselves (which most definitely includes our spouse) and treat others the way we want to be treated. How does one do that without any reserves? When the account is overdrawn? When there is so little left of you that giving more to anyone will cause you to vaporize and completely lose yourself?

Take a look at the story of the poor widow in Luke 21. It is a story of giving out of your emptiness, rather than out of your plenty. Jesus compares the large gifts from the rich that are meaningless because they didn't require a sacrifice, to the tiny, seemingly pointless giving of the widow who had virtually nothing of value to offer. But. She. Gave. Let's bring that story home for just a moment and allow Jesus to address you, regarding your emptiness...

"I tell you the truth. 

This poor widow has put in more than all the others. 

All these people gave their gifts out of their wealth; 

but she out of her poverty put in all she had to live on." 

 (Luke 21:3-4)

I truly doesn't make sense, from a fiscal or mathematical or psychological viewpoint to give out of nothing and end up a winner. But, if Jesus says she is a winner, I'm going with that!  

May I just encourage you right now, if your tank is feeling sucked dry. You don't have to dive in and find that last drop of emotional energy and give it to the person you have pledged to love forever. You really don't have to find the will to give just a little bit more, knowing there will be nothing coming back to you. If your tank feels empty and there is nothing more for you to give, then you only have to give what you are receiving from the Spirit that lives within you. Don't continue to give what isn't in you, but give what is in Him. 

When we cannot give one more ounce of love on our own, we can call out to the Author and Creator of Love and ask Him for a refill that is bigger than our space can contain so it can spill out to our family, our partner, our co-workers, our neighbors, our parents. Don't hoard it because you are starving to be and to feel love. Give it away and you will discover a rich blessing for dropping the walls and loving generously. 

Will you trust God enough to ask for more of His love so you can continue to love well? You can trust Him because He never ever runs out and He is thrilled to see His children love with an everlasting love. If you want a double blessing in your  marriage, work diligently to be the one who loves the best...BUT never ever try to do that alone. You need the real love that comes from your relationship with God. Draw closer. Let Him fill you. Then let it spill out all over your little corner of the world. Like the poor widow, you will be blessed for your generosity.